Miss Manners defends gay parents

Judith Martin, also known as Miss Manners, has used her latest column to defend gay parents. You can find the column here. Meanwhile here's the important part. Bravo to Ms Martin!

Dear Miss Manners:

My partner and I adopted a child three years ago. He has become a happy, silly, active, loving child.

When we were going through the adoption process, the topic of being a "conspicuous family" was discussed. As two men with a child, we fall into that category.

Several times over the last couple of years, we have been verbally attacked. Twice we have been in a grocery store when someone informed us that we were not a "real family." On one of these situations, we were even told that we were condemned to hell!

Another time, when I was having breakfast out with our son, I was discussing children with a woman who was there with two of her own. The conversation was casual and amiable. When I mentioned "my partner" in the conversation, she started shouting at me, "You're evil! You are doing that child a great injustice!"

Our son's birth mother was a heroin and cocaine user during her pregnancy. She had the presence of mind to realize she couldn't take care of him and chose us as his adoptive parents.

We didn't decide to adopt to "save" a child, but the fact is, we will probably be able to give our son a much better life than if he had stayed with his birth mother.

How do we react to these people?

A gentleman of Miss Manners's acquaintance was once subjected to a barrage of unwarranted insults. Outraged on his behalf, she asked why he did not trouble to defend himself.

His reply (and please forgive the inelegance for the sake of vividness) was: "If someone is throwing up on you, you get out of the way. You do not stay around to examine what is coming up."

There is nothing you can say to people who, whatever they may think, see fit to hurl crude insults at you, even in front of your son.

Lou Dobbs kills The Golden Spiders

As many of you will already know, The Golden Spiders is a classic Nero Wolfe mystery novel by Rex Stout. When the A&E network made television films of a few Nero Wolfe novels a few years ago, The Golden Spiders was among the most popular.

The book begins with the death of what we would now call a squeegee kid, engaged in what the book calls the wipe racket. However, the kid is killed to protect an extortion racket targetting displaced persons (refugees). The book was written shortly after World War II when there were millions of people fleeing the former warzones ofEurope.

The book ends with the heroes, Nero Wolfe and Archie Goodwin, destroying possible evidence, a notebook containing the names and addresses of many of the illegal refugees, which turned up during their investigation into the death of the head of the founder of a refugee aid organization. In other words, the tone of the book is clearly sympathetic to refugees.

Nor is this the only case that this detective hero helps refugees.

Consider now, the modern Lou Dobbs point of view. On Nov 11, Lou Dobbs surprised many by announcing during his regular broadcast on CNN that it would be his last. Lou Dobbs, formerly concerned primarily with business at CNN, has in recent years become the centre of anti-immigration, especially anti-Latino rhetoric in the United States.

In the words of Brian Stetler in the New York Times:

Mr. Dobbs is a longtime proponent of strict enforcement of immigration laws. His critics, who say he spreads misinformation about immigrants, have stepped up efforts in recent months to have him fired.

Which is the "real" America? The one where The Golden Spiders is popular, or where Lou Dobbs gets big ratings? Time will tell.

Remembrance Day service

I am something of a closet royalist. Being a royalist is a bit passé in Canada: we like the Queen (in the English speaking parts of Canada, at least), mostly because a) she's cool b) no known bad habits c) free. We have a Monarchist league here, but I'm not a member.

Anyway, Prince Charles and his wife are currently in British Columbia, and I read in the newspaper the following:

On Saturday, they fly to Vancouver to view the Olympic and Paralympic village before attending separate engagements in the afternoon, returning to Victoria for a reception and dinner at Government House, where they’re staying.

On Sunday, they’ll attend the 10:30 a.m. remembrance service at Christ Church cathedral, then on Monday, they’ll visit CFB Esquimalt before flying to Ottawa in the afternoon.

Me, taking note of the fact that I had not attended church in a while, and Christ Church Cathedral in Vancouver in a very long time (20 years), I got up early this morning, put on a suit, and travelled downtown to the Cathedral.

Approaching the Cathedral from the North on Burrard Street from the North, I discovered that Burrard Street was blocked. I went around and found a parking space in a nearby parkade. I walked over to the church, went in a found a seat.

My first impression was that the church was a lot roomier than it was on my last visit. I was expecting this, since the church recently underwent major renovations, and in fact 6 years earlier, when the Church was within walking distance of my apartment, visiting it was like visiting a construction site. So I went to another (and closer) church (St Paul's) in that time frame, which remains my "home church", even though I no longer live in that neighbourhood.

Back to today.

The next thing I noticed is that "pews" were few and far between. The old pews (wooden benches) were still there, but clustered at the back. The new seats were padded chairs linked together. After some consternation, I decided it was a very good thing for my aching back.

The next thing I noticed was that the church wasn't nearly as full as I expected from a Royal visit. However by the time the service began, the church was nearly full.

During the service, it was noted briefly that the expected royal presence wasn't happening (partly because a new stained-glass window they were planning to dedicate wasn't ready, and also because the designers thereof weren't on hand).

I found the service deeply moving. I'll explain that another time.

After the service was over, I made for the door, since I had to be at another church in a remote part of the city for a choir practice. As I went down (literally, it's down hill) the street, I still noted a media circus and thought the royal couple would still be on hand.

However, as I made my way around a corner, a man blocked my way and asked me take the other side of the street -- they were shooting a movie!

As for the newspaper quote cited above, it was perfectly accurate: the royal couple attended Christ Church Cathedral in Victoria this morning.

All in all, I learned a thing or today.

Hong Kong, March 19, 1992

香港深井麗都花园 1992年3月19日

License Plates & Feng Shui

License plates [for cars] in Hong Kong come in two varieties: letters + numbers (the usual kind) or numbers only. The second type are sold at auction. Some numbers are far more popular than others. The trouble is that the Cantonese word for 4 四 "sei" (mid level tone) is quite similar to 死 (death).  This is also true in Mandarin.  This is in additition to Chinese notions of Feng Shui (Wind and Water), basically a complex form of superstition.

The combination of Western and Chinese superstition leads to the omission  of both 13 and 14 [certainly dead] from floor numbers in some (not all) buildings. The Nan Fung Centre (where I work) has Floor 15 one level above Floor 12, but served by different banks of elevators so that 12 and 15 don't appear on the same control panel making it obvious.  On the other hand, Lido Garden where I live [5 36-storey buildings] doesn't do that.

Hong Kong, March 18, 1992

香港深井麗都花园 1992年3月18日

Picked up my new tailored suit today. A tailored suit is a first for me.

Shopping in Hong Kong

HK has frequently been promoted as a shopping paradise.  From certain points of view, this perception is accurate. For sample in Sham Shui Po [part of Kowloon], there is something called the Golden Computer Centre with many computer stores in 1 building [ in the basement of a housing estate]. In another district in kowloon called Mong Kok (旺角), the most densely populated area on Earth, there are countless shoe, camera, jewelry & audio stores. While some of them are a mite unscrupulous, it certainly qualifies as a mecca for such items.

Many kinds of food are quite cheap here.  Most of it comes from China or California. Some items noticeably more expensive than in the US or Canada are: apples, apple juice, fresh milke (984ml milk costs HK $16.80 or about US$2). Imported UHT (ultra-high temperature) milk from New Zealand costs half that. [Note in 2009, I think this is wrong, it costs more].  This reflects the smaller importance of milk here [Hong Kong]  and milk's scarcity in China.

[Note from 2009: recently milk's profile was rising in China prior to the recent melamine poisoning scandal]

President de Klerk got his "yes" vote but I'm not hopeful about South Africa's future

[Note from 2009: fortunately I was wrong about that]

More on shopping

For quality things, however, you can expect to pay as much or more than [you would pay] elsewhere.

Hong Kong, March 17, 1992

香港深井麗都花园 1992年3月17日

The Canon Wittenbach

On sunday, I visited St Andrew's Anglican church in Kowloon [Note: this church is on Nathan Road, near the tourist district].  According to a church leaflet:

"During the Japanese occupation of World War 2, St Andrew's was put to a different use. The Vicar, the Rev (now Canon) Wittenbach, was interned during the war.  

This is all I've been able to discover so far about Canon Wittenbach. I'd like to know more.

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OK With the Internet now in 2009 we have a bit more information about Canon Wittenbach.

For instance at http://www.ttc.edu.sg/csca/rart_doc/ang/sing/wittenbach1953.htm

we find 

Harry August Wittenbach was Church Missionary Society's East Asia Secretary from 1947 to 1957, and their Asia Secretary from 1957 to 1961. His East Asia tour to Nippon SKK (Anglican Church in Japan), the newly reconstituted Diocese of Hong Kong and Macao, and finally to the Diocese of Singapore from 1953 to 1954 sought to assess how the churches fared in the new socio-political situation following the Communist take-over in China. Wittenbach formerly worked as a CMS missionary in South China, and was interned in the prisoner-of-war camp, Hong Kong during the Japanese Occupation. In 1947 he succeeded Gurney Barclay to become CMS's East Asia Secretary.

Also, I found out that the St Andrew's building was made into a Japanese Buddhist temple during the war.